Typing this on the bus again, i'm such a silly lil goober :3 (derogitory)
I'm having a pretty good morning today which is always a nice feeling. This is like the first time in my life I have had a full on social life, like I kind of have money now so I can invite my homies to lunch. Gift giving as a whole is kind of weird to me, like my love language is physical affection but i'm scared to give it so I have just gone to gift giving, but I always feel weird since like, I have been broke for a long time but now I have a little bit of money I want to give it to my friends, like i'm asking them what they want, I want to pay them back for years of covering for me, like I feel so lucky to have these people in my life and I wanna give them a hug, but I don't have the balls for that.
What spurred this whole fucking yap session is like I said I'm taking my friend out for lunch and I feel really good, i'm happy I can express my gratitude, like i'm not good enough with my words to say thank you good enough, and i'm too scared to physically show it, so like, being able to just buy my homie lunch feels so good, I can at least show him I care by giving something ya know?
I think thats probably my longest personal yap session, which I think is some evidence that these stupid entrys are gonna start getting longer which is "fun"
I have been looking into universty and shit, and it's weird since I wanna go into computer science, but I have been thinking, why the fuck should I give 20+ grand to RMIT and spend 4 years of my life in uni, when I could just do some apprenticships and study my ass off for the next two years, then get an entry level computer science job, then after 4 years of that i'll probably be in a better place then an out of university postion. The key thing with that is I have to study com sci for the next two years, which is very doable, I just need to not be a lazy cunt.
I'm getting a bit sadge and in my own head rn so imma cut this entry here and just work these weird thoughts out, bye bye nerddddd!!
-love
DB
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